rude awakening

2006-10-07T21:25:00.000-07:00

001. Real Name: Mohammat Faiz Bin Mohammat Apandi
002. Nickname: I dunno. Faiz? LOL
003. Single or taken: single. I think. WAHAHAHA
004. Zodiac Sign: Aries
005. Male or Female: male
006. Elementary School: Teck Whye Primary School
007. Ipod: nahhhh. Nothing of that sort.
008. How many buddies on your list: wad the hell are u trying to get at?
009. friendster name: inked
010. Hair Color: Black. A bit of brown and some white also
012. Hair long or short: shortttt like meee
014. Eye Color: errrr. Black? Lol … I dunno I cant see properly
015. Are you health freak: nope
016. Height: 168?
017. Do you have a crush on someone: nooooo
018. Do you like yourself: HAHAHAHA. I KNEW IT. THIS IS GAYYYY.
019. Braces? Im not metalmouth boy
020. Think you're awesome? YES OF COURSE. HAHAHAHA
021. Piercings: no such thing
022. Tattoo: nope and not intending to get one. Ever.

your firsts:
024. Surgery: spinal disc relocation surgery
025. First piercing: NO PIERCING
026. First best friend: oh wait lemme see lemme see. Ah yes asyraf.
027. First Award: neatest boy award. Primary 4. WAHAHAHAHHAA. (im serious. Lol.)
028. First Sport You Joined: fencing
029. First pet: TURTLE!! ( or is it tortoise?)
030. First vacation: malaysia
031. First Concert: I dun think I ever went to any concert except lame sch concerts. Hahaha.
032. First love: no love yet. All crushes. But came close in secondary school.Favorites.
033. Favorite movie: that should be ‘here come the titans?’
034. Favorite TV show: whose line is it anyway. Lol.
035. Color: greeeeennn. i dunno .. I just whackkkk the burgerrr
036. Music: im versatile. Just no techno.
039. Drink: that drink that’s like kinda transparent. Quite nice. Drink it everyday
040. Body part: HAHAHAHA. Im not gonna say it here. LOL.
041. Cartoon: spongebob squarepants.
042. Favorite piece of clothing: polo tee
043. Brand Of Clothing: anything except wad china brand or something.
044. What do you sleep with: myself
045. Favorite School: Bukit Panjang Govt High (not the sch just the ppl I meet there)
046. Favorite Animal: hamsterrrrrrrr. Nyahahahahaha.
047. Favorite Book: the whisper
048. Favorite Magazine: I dun read mags
049. Eating: anything halal.
050. I'm drinking: plain water (fav drink… wooooo..)
052. I'm about to: watch cartoon
053. Listening to: nothing
055. Waiting for: lomohomolomohomolomohomo. Cam (damn kayda)
056. Watching: me myself and i
057. Wearing: boxersYour Future
058. Want Kids: should be
059. Want to Get Married: should be
060. Careers in Mind: not really set on anything. Just considering maritime sector

Which is better with the Opposite Gender.
068. Lips or Eyes: eyes
069. Hugs or Kisses: both
070. Shorter or Taller: er shorter? LOL.
072. Romantic or Spontaneous: mixture of both.
073. Nice stomach or nice arms: lol weird qn seriously. As long as they are not fatter than me. HAHAHAHA
074. Sensitive or Loud: sensitive
075. Hook-up or Relationship: hoooookkkkuppppp
076. Sweet or Caring: both
077. Trouble Maker or Hesitant: bothhhhhhhhhHave you ever.
78. Kissed a Stranger: NOOO
079. Drank bubbles: THIS IS DUMBBB
080. Lost glasses/contacts: YESSSSS
081. Ran Away From Home: NOOOO
082. Broken a bone: oh yes.
083. Got an X-ray: twice
084. broken someones Heart: I don’t think so
086. Turned Someone Down: think so. LOL. Maybe.
087. Cried When Someone died: like duhhhh
088. Cried at school: quite some time ago

Do You Believe In.
089. God: yeah baybeh
090. Miracles: nope.
091. Love at first sight: that’s dumbbbb. Its called lust.
093. Aliens: LOL. Yes. This small cute and innocent girl (self proclaimed). LOL. HAHAHAHAHA.
094. Magic: nope
095. Heaven: yup
096. Santa Claus: nope
097. Sex on the first date: NOOOO
097. Kissing on the first date: NOPPPPPEEEE
099. Angels: yes.
Answer Truthfully.
100. Is there someone You Want to be with right now? No one

--Here is the deal: 1. Put your music player on shuffle. 2. Press forward for each question. 3. Use the song title as the answer to the question. And there you have it...

01 how does the world see me? Ice queen !!! ( HAHAHAHAHA. IM A QUEEN)
02 Will I have a happy life? Hold my hand ( hahaha damn weird)
03 What do my friends really think of me? Story of a girl?!! (HAHAHAHAH WTF THIS IS GAY)04 Do people secretly lust after me? In stereo? (no link)
05 How can you be happy? Change your mind ( wise thing to do)
06 What should I do with my life? Science ( OMG THAT’S SICK. Why would I wan my life to revolve round science)
07 Why must life be so full of pain? Polaris ( ooo nice songggg. But not bad. The song is abt pain)08 Will I ever have children? Swallowed in the sea ( NOW THAT’S SCARY)
09 Will I die happy? An jing. HAHAHA.
10 What is some good advice for me? Best of you.
11 What is happiness? Question ( really that’s a song. Hahah.)
12 What's my favourite fetish? enterlude
13 How will I be remembered? Relax relapse
14 What is your love life like? La tortura. (I haven’t even heard this song b4.i think its my sis’s)
15 What's your life motto? Cemetery drive (damn sad. Lol. My life’s a cemetery)
16 What do your parents think of you? A decade under the influence
17 What's your favourite hobby? Everybody’s changing ( no linkkkkk)
18 What does your best friend really think of you? I write sins not tragedies. ( shit that is true)19 What's the worst thing about you? Dive right in.( ooooo)
20 Describe your mind? Positivity (sua how come suddenly everything is relevant. Shit scary) 21 How will you die? Dirty little secret( remind me not to have affairs)
22 How does your crush feel about you? How I could just kill a man. (HAHAHAHAHAHA. Fierce crush)
23 What is your wedding going to be like? Save me (shit u!!! I WANNA GET MARRIED)
24 What about your honeymoon? Wonderful ( ahhh. Gd to knowww)
25 Describe the last day of your life? Sundial dreams ( oh goddammit this is getting really scary) 26 Why does life suck? Speed of light (HAHAHA life is not even at the speed of light)
27 Why does life rule? Sinfonia concertante in E flat, K.364 for Violin, Viola and Orchestra - 1. Allegro maestoso
29 What's the craziest thing you'll ever do? Gimme some motivation
30 Will you achieve your goals? Shame on a nigga (HAHAHA. What does that mean?)
31 What will your future job be like? Wind below? (ill be farting? Sounds fun.)
32 Your party life? The minute I met you
33 Overall, will you be happy? Lose my breath (damn I must be very happy) LOL.
34 Or will you just deal with it? action

Name twenty people you can think of right now.Don't read the question(s) until you've named the 20 people.At the end of this, choose five people to do this.
1. asyraf
2. azhar
3. ikhsan
4. edwin
5. kayda
6. desmond
7. ivan
8. seri
9. sahira
10. vicky
11. stella
12. vicole
13. valerie
14. shufen
15. mrs rajasegar
16. ms tan yen nee
17. mr kwok
18. andre
19. li nan
20. syazwan

How did you meet #14? In sch?
What would you do if you didn't meet #1? I WLD BE ONE LONELY DICK.
What if #9 and #20dated? Oooooo. I dunno. haven tried putting them together. hmmm
Would #6 and #17? LOL. DESMOND AND KWOK?!!! HAHAHAHAHA. omggggg
Describe #3 political basket. Hahahahhaa.
#8 attractive? Er okokok la ….. HAHAHAHA.
Describe #7 shoulders that can double as hangers. Freak. LOL.
Know of any #12 family members? I know how many ppl they are made of. But know them? No.
What would you do if #18 confesses to you that he likes you? Hahahahahaha. NOOOOO. Not andre.
What language does #15 speak? english
Who is #9 going out with? Im clueless ( who who? Tell me)
How old is #16? HAHAHAHA. Dun know. 20 plus?
When is the last time you spoke to #13? One year ago
Who is #2's favourite band/singer? Guns and roses
Would you ever date #4? OH SHIT. NOT EDWIN THE PSEUDO MAT.
Would you ever date #1? HAHAHAHAHA NOOOO.
Is #19 single? Shouldn’t be. hahahaha
What's #10's last name? vikneswari d/o sukumaran. Now fig. out whats her last name urself
Would you ever be in a relationship with #11? NOOOO. She despises short guys. HAHAHA
School of #3? PJC
Where does #6 live? Yishun I think
What's your fave thing about #5? NOTHINGGGGGG. HAHAHAHAHA.
Have you seen #2 oh shit nv again. LOL.

Okay, here are five UNLUCKY people to do this survey,
1. Edwin
2. kayda
3. amir
4. ikhsan
5. you

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE:
1. waiter
2.
3.
4.

FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER:
1. matrix
2. shallow hal
3. remember the titans
4. thank you for smoking

FOUR CITIES YOU'VE LIVED IN:
1. singapore
2.
3.
4.

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH:
1. prison break
2. whose line is it anyway
3. smallville
4. 24

FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION:
1. malaysia
2.
3.
4.

FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY:
1. email
2. torrent webbies
3.
4.

FOUR OF YOUR ALL-TIME FAVORITE RESTAURANTS:
1. seoul garden
2. swensens
3. rex
4.

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS:
1. chicken stew (my mom’s)
2. curry
3. chicken rice
4. murtabak

FOUR SCHOOLS YOU'VE ATTENDED:
1. some kindergarten
2. teck why pri
3. bpghs
4. pioneer

FOUR PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW:
1. in bed
2.
3.
4.

FOUR THINGS YOU FIND YOURSELF SAYING
1. knnbccb
2. super cooollll
3. wahhhh quite funny leh uuuu
4. repulsive shits

2006-09-25T09:45:00.000-07:00

woooo. gp was shit today. thought was okay cept for summary but the little terrorist seems to be suffering severe trauma from today's experience. but nonetheless i shall be ignorant.

anyway yesh, i just hope i wun die for physics. i mean it really wouldnt be my fault if i dun pass the physics promo paper cos as far as im concerned ive done my part. this is like more than ive ever done for physics in my whole goddamn life and if i still cant pass. i dunno wad to say. get out of jc for one.

but wth. wooooo. i wanna break fast (as in BREAK FAST not breakfast, you dicks.) with the old palsssssssss after promos you hear. oh yah and training's resuming next friday. superb, i will be superman, i will tackle and i will shout and i will run. ALL WITHOUT WATER. yesH!!!!!! ive gotta be going crazy. let me leave you guys with a quote from my gp essay:

"money is by far the engine of the development while sports, the driver, is still in control"

NO LINK!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

2006-09-22T18:55:00.000-07:00

WOOOOOO ....

Im finally updating, for all those who thought i died, got ran over by a dick and screwed left right centre back upside down. im fine.......

i think i shall update more now with my future certainly undefined, unperturbed and certainly unchanged by hard work and even more hard work. if u guys are guessing what im trying to get, the intelligent ones would know, im still not leading a happy life in jc. life's pretty aimless here, i still dun quite understand my choice. pretty sad for a 17 yr old with a big nose and a small head.

promos are coming and i dun feel the slightest bit prepared for any kinda shit the papers gonna throw at me (even after doing various tys qns, look at what happened to my oscillations. major wtf.) i dun even know what the hell im doing wrong, if im an ultimate slacker, who really just doesnt do work and just get funny grades like i keep getting, i wouldnt be the slightest bit worried. but when i do work and i still get funny grade i start thinking if i AM a retard. somehow i get the idea ms tan wants me to retain, not as in not wanting to help me, she helps when needed. shes a great teacher, just that she thinks im demoralised by being in a competitive class, but thats not true! im not! the demoralised one is the other dickhead who like to put words into the mouths of others.

ah shit lets cut the depressing stuff, i nd to start getting a life man, shd hang out more with old pals after promos (hinthint). i shd start organising things for my class. i dun quite get s13, i thought we bonded pretty well, we dun try to cut down one another's throats, we make gd jokes and we talk a lot. But whenever someone tries to organise something, everybody does a fabulous 50m sidestep while another just cant think of anything. LOL. cant blame you ppl, ill just have to think of something. anyway back to physics tys then. ciao.

2006-05-08T06:45:00.000-07:00

im seriously pissed with some ppl i know (god i dun even know why i got to know them) .... they try to act like they're the best around and i get pissed off with that .. the kind of attitude im sick and tired of seeing everyday .. most ppl who know me well wld know .. that if i dun shout 'fuck off' in your face but just a normal 'fuck off' without even looking at you i really mean fuck off ... but the thing is they just dont get it .. im not trying to act like a bigshot ... but when i want to i can really hammer you anyway i want .. so i would walk away and fuck off if i were you ..

nonetheless im seriously stupefied how i happened to end up in S13 .. i really dun fit in .. lol .. im surrounded by smart asses who'll be like president or sumthin while im still flying kite ... i seriously dun wanna retain .. if i do .. it will be the dumbest thing i ever did .. cos it wld prove to me that my decision to go jc ... was a useless one .. and i dun wan to end up proving myself right .. it sucks ....

anyway i just realised im the most hostile bastard any stranger could come across, i wldnt talk i wldnt breathe a word .. ill just stare and once i start talking .. my serpentine tongue can really destroy ppl if they are pussies .. otherwise ... they'll just be entertained .. haha .. IM SERIOUS ... anyway i realised, my post today is bullshit .. so yeah i just wrote piles of shit that makes my toilet bowl look good

2006-05-06T08:07:00.000-07:00

HOLA BITCHES!!!! IM BACK!!!

its been a long long time since i came back to this shitty place but yeah point is IM BACK. Now for some long awaited updates:

I've stopped working at ramen ten, planning to go back there durin june holidays to make the resignation official. yup, and yeah my o level results was pretty ok and managed to get into pioneer junior college, most of those who are close to me know that i have a cursed tongue and when i said 'i wont even go to jc unless i get 15 or below', well as u see god kinda marked my words for me and gave me the bloody 15. hahahahaha.

life's kinda whacked for me now. i din go for the first three mths and now have a hell lotsa things to catch up to. nonetheless, im trying to accept the people i meet in pjc though some are so full of shit that they make me think my ass is heaven. same as always, when they said jc was gonna be more fun than sec sch, let me tell you, its all fucking bull. jc is like sec sch but with gazillion torture mechanisms which work almost simultaneously with one another to cut you up through the front left right centre back upside down, u get what im trying to say.

but one good thing i found coming to pioneer was rugby. damn its like the one place where i whack everything and anything, get whacked back, and walk away feeling like im on top of the world. its where i found the statement 'pain is good' greatly enlightening. oh, and im being tasked to train as a hooker, the guy who would be wearing no. 2 for matches, din expect it but heck .. gotta train harder then ..... see you guys when i see you ... ciao

2006-01-30T17:08:00.000-08:00

29/1/06:

i will remember.

Shit guys, i think im in love, maybe infatuated. But no, being through some of the craziest waterfalls and coming back bottoms down straight up, i do know the difference between the two. ahhhhh damn, maybe not, I DUNNOOOOOOOO. But this is the first time ive felt like this ever again since you-know-who, the last person who ever made an impact on my life. And now this girl, this grace, looks set to undo the stitches that scar my body and open me up once again. Now only one thing can happen, that i get scarred again or my scars fill themselves up with this holy presence.

paris.25.

2006-01-26T12:11:00.000-08:00

It was like something straight out of an average straight joe movie. Boy knocks girl's stuff, girl's stuffs drops, boy helps girl pick up stuff then they fall in love. Now you know why all that is a scam cos here's how the real thing turns out actually. LOL

I was walking down along orchard moving to paragon after work, then somewhere along the way saw this girl carrying a lot of stuffs. Woooo, like superman, oops no wonder woman. Wonder woman in kiasu chinese new year frenzy to be precise. I continued walking in her direction and her in mine. The pavement was packed, there was absolutely no way i could move anywhere else. Wonder woman being the slim roti prata that she is tried to squeeze through like a bloody no 5 from a rugby team and guess what happened? She hit FAIZ, of all ppl, die, ok now im straying from my main plot. The immediate chain reaction from that hit resulted in her dropping almost all her hard earned loot (she did look like a robber, i swear, in skirts and heels). So faiz, being the constant gentleman that he is (shit dun laugh), bent down to help her pick up her loot (im forever regarding it as loot). Then she began saying all the sweetest shenanigans to me, oh what an angel, earth angel, earth angel ...... (damn love that song), then i fell in love with her at first sight, i just had to tell her how i felt.

YAH RIGHT

this is her lovely remarks to me:

Wonderwoman: you stupid bitch, cant you see where you're walking, are you blind or are you stupid?

Now is that passionate or wad guys, such heartwarming words. I just had to give her more LOVE. So i just smiled and confessed all of my deepest and most honest feelings towards her. My vocab being immensely superior than hers managed to get my feelings across more clearly. So i stuffed my earphones into my ears left her and her loot on the floor and walked away. We broke up that same minute we met, such a disappointment.

There you go, no wonder they say chivalry's dead, cos the world's just too full of wonderwoman oredi. So lesson of the day, for the girls, when guys try to help you and say sorry even though its YOUR mistake, try to shut up and appreciate the gesture and for guys, stock up on those beautiful vocab cos we definitely need to show more love.

p.s. she was wearing sunglasses at 2145h, shit I MUST BE BLIND.

2006-01-19T19:10:00.000-08:00

It was me right there as i lay lifeless, still on the bed, wondering how absurd my life had been. For a long time, seldom did i realise the fact that my life had nothing to do with others but instead how i wrecked my skin and bones trying to build up various facades to conceal, surround and even at times, protect myself and others from the one danger i perceived could really hurt me, myself. The friends i got to know, the foes, the colleagues, many at times was i too concerned of the paranoia if they were acting, if they were liars, if all i had was just a b-grade movie flick. As i relived every single dirty little detail of my past, i tried to find the tiny specks of true happiness i have felt over the years. I found a few, little you could say, but significant at its best.

When i was 13, I met a friend, stuck together through thick and thin, jokes and laughter shared and pain in the ass to each other. Until now i never discovered what it is about him that opened me up until now. In truth, within me, i already knew the answer to that question, the fact that this friend i met, in all honesty would say 'fuck' when things are fucked up, would jump like a baffoon if things were great and would be so full of shit when things get high. Instead i would say 'cool' when things were fucked up, walk away or think harder and even risk being paranoid if things were great and think of darker thoughts when things got high. His honesty, the frankness of his existence versus my wall of facades my countless emmy award winning acting always tied with one another, often i could see through him and he would always see through me. I am not gay and never will be but he is one whom i will stick by as long as im needed and when others say 'friends forever' for fun i say 'call me when you need me' for real.

At 14, i met an equivalent of him in the body of a girl, that very frankness, the understanding. Simply magnificent, she never turned a closer companion for closer companions were never built nor durable enough to withstand challenges of friendship, the outstanding link that is always formed, the inner vow to be true to one another and to know that when one says 'fuck', he is not joking and you're not supposed to criple under pressure and take it personally. To know that when he says 'fuck' hes not talking to you but to himself and his inner demons. To understand this is a challenge and to stand rooted through thick and thin with this belief is a virtue.

Then there was this girl, when i was 15, an angel in character and in grace, she did what no one could have done, she opened me up over and over again, my smiles became genuine, my age was reduced to 10 and i was nothing but a servant at her beck and mercy. I would have done almost anything humanly possible, almost, but i didn't. I was an ass, coxcomb and a dim-witted fool for all i care, to have caused that very entity of grace i nearly gave my soul to to be my biggest downfall. Up till now i never knew the answer to what had actually happened. But through the years, i gain acceptance of the outcome, to learn that certain answers could never be found and if did, would it be what i hoped it would be, if it did, what would happen to me? I took control and chose to keep mum and appreciate the joy she gave me even to see her smile, to see her walk and to hear her talk and to all these i owe her too much to bear.
To all those i owe what i am now to, i would forever vow allegiance to you and never more to anyone else. This is why im lately plagued with the question i am always begging myself to evade. What if i break away, what if in that struggle to find that link to disconnect i could never go back, would it be worth it, would it be timely and appropriate to lose it all, what if i lost these memories, would i ever be free? and i think and think again. This time, even harder ............

2005-12-26T23:44:00.000-08:00

ill finally update for u shits out there .. 15 mins b4 going to work .... i feel like quitting my job .... too hectic for the kind of pay i get ... i'll just see how it goes till i get my first pay ... if i still feel like quitting .. pretty much ill quit .... the place is ok .. just that they are far too stingy to have the right mind to post more ppl on busy days .... 3 ppl for service crew? during almost full house? thats nuts .. not cool man ... one blender for drink counter when ur menu includes multiple freezes .... not cool .. come on this is not the way an up and coming jap restaurant shd function .... dinner is far too busy for my liking ... the only good part are the ppl .. very fun interesting bunch ... thats all i shd say .. ill update on thur since i have two off days this week ... ciao ....

2005-12-08T05:52:00.000-08:00

today was the greatest day in a week!! finally a succesful job interview!!! supposed to sign on it by monday ... hope that there wont be any hiccups before monday .... if there isnt then i will be the most happiest man in a week!!

2005-12-02T19:36:00.000-08:00

thursday was prom nite, superbly amazing experience though the 'entertainer' lived up to his reputation of being 'cheap'. nonetheless, it was great. ppl turned party animals in one night. hahaha. girls dancing in stilettos and later complaining of aching feet and then going back to torturing their legs. Now you know why i never understand them.

but later on when we sang auld lang syne, it was a really, really heartfelt moment for me especially, dunno about the rest of yous. but the feeling was very rare to come about especially in my case.

for the girls who've been in my torturous company for four years, you've been the greatest companions belonging to the opposite sex that i have ever come to known and i would miss you gals gr8ly. you girls were an essential part of my life for the past four years and would always be.

for the rest of yous whom i began to know of only in sec 3, like the mafia, the chairman and many more. you ppl were and always will be the souls who made 4p3 possible. imagine the class without canaan and the rest of the mafia and i would wonder if i had turned into an obsolete asshole. Valerie, the ever dignified and respected chairwoman, i would always remember, for her tenacity and vigor in upholding class spirit and discipline.

so thus cheers my good mates and may you shits prosper in whatever you do in the future. as for me, i'll be gone.

2005-11-23T19:41:00.000-08:00